Estimated reading time: 9 minutes
Have you ever accepted a position, only to find that when you start, it’s not as promised? What’s even worse, you get there and find that the “family” environment you were sold, was really just a way of saying “we talk to each other like shit”?. That, my friend, is a telling sign that you’re in a toxic environment.
I’ve been there a few times and I absolutely hate it! There have been some bonuses from joining places like this. For example – I have made some amazing friends, I have been able to empower some of those friend to find jobs that they love and feel appreciated, and most importantly, I have learned how to spot those places in the interview.
Today, I’m going to share with you my secrets to spotting a toxic work environment in the interview.
Work Culture described as a “Family”
Honestly, I think this little banger is no secret. What’s the problem with it though? Well when potential employers say “we’re just like a family”, they actually mean that you have no other family. If your kids are sick? Find someone to look after them. If you’re sick? You can still come in. Oh and if you’re behind in work, work harder.
I worked at this family business for about 6 months. It was just after New Zealand went into its first lockdown, the world didn’t know what was happening with covid and I was made redundant from my previous job. I was desperate and had an interview with a company that I just knew was a toxic environment. In my second interview I was asked what I thought about the company and in my naivety I said: “It seems like you have a lovely a family environment here, and I love it”, what an absolute muppet. That caused my new employer to jump with glee – “oh yes, we’re just like a family here. We have the occasional spats but we get on with it” – Massive red flag!
So what happened there?
Well it wasn’t too bad for me, I’m pretty good at speaking my mind and if I don’t like something – I have no issue with saying it. But I made a great friend there, we shall call her Monique. Monique was the owners “friend”, she had known them for years! Even babysat their kids. Now, Monique felt like they were her family. This isn’t what she wanted to do with her life – she was underpaid, would get yelled at if she fell behind and couldn’t take any time off because there was no one do her work, but… Well there was no but, Monique wasn’t treated like absolute rubbish all under the disguise of “family”.
I spoke to the owner about Monique’s concerns, especially the inability to take a holiday – we’re a “family”, we should be able to say how we feel. Do you know the answer I got? “There is no one else to help you when you choose to take time off, that’s on you. If there was someone to do your work then we don’t actually need you. If you don’t like it, there’s the door”. I handed my notice in a month later and with a bit of a push, Monique handed hers in a year later – She is now doing what she loves, in a job where she feels appreciated.
What are the key takeaways from this story?
The people you work with are not your family, they are your colleagues. A workplace that doesn’t support you, does not deserve your skillset. If you’re not getting what you want from a company, leave. And most importantly, you come first.
Stop asking about work culture, you’ll always get some diluted truth. Instead, ask:
- As an employer, what steps do you have in place to support your staff with illness, busy work periods and annual leave?
- How do you encourage employee engagement in the workplace?
- How do you support your staff with progression?
Potential employers who barter on salary expectations
Alright, so this seems to be something that’s ingrained in a lot of us – Sometimes you need to take a step back to move forward. That doesn’t mean that you should get paid less than what you’re worth for the promised opportunity to progress. Sign of a toxic work environment? ✅
I was successful in an interview once. The pay range advertised was in line with my expectations and the opportunity for growth was there. When I got the call, the salary I was offered was below what I asked but after proving myself, they would review in 3 months time. Honestly, I knew I could prove myself and appreciated the opportunity to show them how great I was – absolute sucker.
The pay review came about 6 months later with extra responsibilities. My portfolio increased to the highest it had ever been, and you can imagine my excitement when they decided to incorporate a commission into my pay structure (one that others were already getting) – My hard work was beginning to pay off! Almost 6 months after, I finally got it. It was half of everyone else’s and my budget? The same. When I queried this with my employer, I was told “You’ve grown the portfolio well above what we ever anticipated, we believe you can make it the most profitable portfolio we have but the other team members currently bring in more”. A couple of months later, a new company reached out to me – they offered more money for less work. I think it’s safe to say I took it.
Key takeaways from this story?
If your salary expectations align with your skillset, don’t negotiate. If a company doesn’t come to the party at the beginning, they won’t later on. Know you’re worth, move on if a better opportunity comes knocking.
Instead of negotiating your salary, do this instead:
- This is my salary expectation because I will bring this skillset to your company.
- In the last 5 years, how often have you reviewed and offered a pay increase and/or progression to employees?
- What is your salary range of similar roles and do you have bonus/commission structures available to everyone?
Employers who ask about your flexibility
This little gem is a big one! What makes it worse is that we have this fear of failure that I believe some employers use to their advantage. Let’s just get this one straight – If you get paid $40 an hour for a 40hr week, but you actually work 60hrs a week – You’re only getting paid $26 an hour. Is $26 an hour a fair value for your skillset?
So I’m going to tell you about the most toxic work environment I have ever been in. Initially, the owner of this company didn’t want to hire me, his thoughts were that I was too easy going, I wouldn’t understand the importance of getting things done immediately and I certainly wouldn’t be going over and above. He was wrong and if I had known about his comments before I accepted, I wouldn’t have taken the role.
The job was very hard at the beginning, I felt like I had to prove something. After a year, I was offered a new job with a much higher salary. To keep me, my existing employer counter offered and I stayed. But my responsibilities increased well beyond what one person could handle and my hours went from 40hrs per week to about 60 on most weeks. Eventually I spoke up and this is what I was told “lawyers don’t get paid the big bucks because of their skillset, they get paid it because they work well beyond 40 hours a week, I work more than 40 hours a week and this is what’s expected”. I am ashamed to say that I stayed there for 3 years, But I did learn a valuable lesson – Don’t be a sucker!
What are the takeaways from this story?
Don’t work beyond the hours you’re paid for. If you can’t complete the duties of your role within the allocated timeframe, it’s not your problem. Lawyers get paid the big bucks because of their skillset and qualifications, not because of the hours they work.
Things to look out for in an interview:
- Egos – You can never please someone who thinks the world of themselves
- The statement “We’re looking for someone who’s flexible and is willing to go over and above”. That usually means a lot of unpaid work.
- The statement “A busy and varied role”. They’ve merged two roles and the previous person burnt themselves out and left.
So, remember
An interview isn’t just for the employer to get to know you, it’s also an opportunity for you to know what you’re about to walk into.
By using my previous experience in some toxic work places. I hope you’ll be able to spot the warning signs of a toxic environment before you enter. If for some reason you don’t listen to me, and then regret it, just know – you can always leave. And who knows, you may make a new friend like my mate Monique and inspire them to leave an unhealthy workplace and seek out better opportunities.
Whatever you do with this information I just want you to understand that your worth isn’t defined by someone else’s opinion. You are amazing and you deserve to get what you want. Until next time peeps x
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How to Spot a Toxic Work Environment in the Interview
Have you ever accepted a position, only to find that when you start, it’s not as promised? What’s even worse, you get there and find that the “family” environment you were sold, was really just a way of saying “we talk to each other like shit”?. That, my friend, is a telling sign that you’re…